May Is Older Americans Month: Five Estate Planning Conversations to Have With Your Parents This Spring

Every May, the federal Administration for Community Living recognizes Older Americans Month — a national observance dedicated to honoring the contributions of older adults and encouraging families to support aging loved ones in meaningful ways. It is also widely recognized as National Elder Law Month within the legal community. Together, they offer the perfect opportunity to do something most families put off for years: have an honest conversation with your parents about their estate plan.

For many adult children, the idea of bringing up wills, powers of attorney, or long-term care feels uncomfortable. We worry about overstepping, upsetting our parents, or seeming as though we are focused on inheritance. But waiting until a crisis hits — a fall, a sudden hospitalization, a diagnosis of cognitive decline — almost always makes things harder, more expensive, and more emotionally painful for everyone involved.

If you have been putting off "the conversation," here are five questions worth raising this May.

1. Do you have an updated will, and where is it kept?

A will written twenty years ago, when the kids were young and the house had a different mortgage, may no longer reflect your parents' wishes — or current state law. Ask whether the document has been reviewed in the last five years and whether the named executor is still able and willing to serve.

2. Who would make medical decisions if you couldn't?

A healthcare power of attorney (sometimes called a healthcare proxy or advance directive) names someone to make medical choices when a person cannot speak for themselves. Without one in place, families often end up in court asking a judge for the authority to act — exactly when they need to be focused on their loved one.

3. Who would manage your finances if you were incapacitated?

A durable financial power of attorney allows a trusted person to pay bills, manage accounts, and handle property if your parent becomes unable to do so. This is often the single most important document for avoiding a guardianship proceeding later in life.

4. Have you thought about long-term care?

The cost of assisted living and nursing care continues to rise, and Medicare does not cover most of it. Your parents may have insurance, savings, or a strategy in mind — or they may have nothing in place. Either way, knowing where things stand allows the whole family to plan together.

5. Where are the important documents?

Even the best estate plan is useless if no one can find it. Ask your parents where they keep their will, trust documents, insurance policies, deeds, and account statements — and whether anyone besides them has access.

These conversations do not need to happen all at once, and they should not feel like an interrogation. Frame them as an act of care, not control. Many of our clients tell us that once the topic is finally on the table, their parents are relieved to discuss it.

At The Smith Law Firm, we help families across our community put these protections in place — often working with multiple generations at the same kitchen table. If your parents do not yet have a current estate plan, or if you are not sure whether what they have still works, we would be honored to help. Visit www.shawnsmithlaw.com or call our office to schedule a confidential consultation.  You can also book an appointment here.

This May, give your parents — and yourself — the peace of mind that comes from knowing the plan is in place.